Home sweet home
My bags are not packed (yet) but I'm certainly ready to go. Guess what I'm NOT taking with me? The Thesis. I'm leaving it behind in Glasgow and I plan to enjoy several weeks of thesis-free relaxation.
A reward I bought for myself for finishing the thesis (it was a great motivator to finish!) was a lens for my camera so I'm looking forward to playing around with it. I'm looking forward to seeing my friends and family, and I think they're as excited about it as I am. The one sad notable exception is someone I used to be pretty close to; let's call him R. R's reaction when I informed him of my imminent arrival in SL was lukewarm to say the least, and when specifically asked "Do you think we will meet up?" was a lackluster half-arsed "I suppose so". Disappointing to say the least, as I had always considered R one of my closest friends, but it's a pattern to his behaviour I have noticed in the past few years; it seems that he only makes an effort to be my friend and keep in touch/meet up with me when he is single. Since he's currently in a relationship with someone, I guess that's me out of the picture. Needless to say it makes me feel like a piece of meat but I think it reflects worse on him for seemingly having ulterior motives to being friends with me. I'd by lying if I said it doesn't bother me, but honestly, I've worked too hard the past few months and been through too much the past year to let this ruin things for me now.
A small part of me (okay a big part) is slightly apprehensive about going home. The past couple of months have been intensely difficult and my mindset has been focused entirely on 'finish thesis, submit, get a flight back home'. I haven't had time to think about the 'being home' part of it. It's been just over a year now since the last time I went home, and this time will be infinitely different to all the previous times I've been home. There will be so many memories to deal with like seeing my dad's clothes, seeing the stuff we bought together, seeing his handwriting on random stuff...stuff I can easily block out when I'm in Glasgow. There will be so many things that I can no longer do with my dad like late Sunday afternoon rides in the car with the top down, trips to Yala and Udawalawe...I don't think I've really thought about that side of it, nor prepared myself for it, so I'm hoping that part won't suck too badly.
So yeah, mixed feelings about getting on a plane on Monday, but overall I think it should be a good break!
A reward I bought for myself for finishing the thesis (it was a great motivator to finish!) was a lens for my camera so I'm looking forward to playing around with it. I'm looking forward to seeing my friends and family, and I think they're as excited about it as I am. The one sad notable exception is someone I used to be pretty close to; let's call him R. R's reaction when I informed him of my imminent arrival in SL was lukewarm to say the least, and when specifically asked "Do you think we will meet up?" was a lackluster half-arsed "I suppose so". Disappointing to say the least, as I had always considered R one of my closest friends, but it's a pattern to his behaviour I have noticed in the past few years; it seems that he only makes an effort to be my friend and keep in touch/meet up with me when he is single. Since he's currently in a relationship with someone, I guess that's me out of the picture. Needless to say it makes me feel like a piece of meat but I think it reflects worse on him for seemingly having ulterior motives to being friends with me. I'd by lying if I said it doesn't bother me, but honestly, I've worked too hard the past few months and been through too much the past year to let this ruin things for me now.
A small part of me (okay a big part) is slightly apprehensive about going home. The past couple of months have been intensely difficult and my mindset has been focused entirely on 'finish thesis, submit, get a flight back home'. I haven't had time to think about the 'being home' part of it. It's been just over a year now since the last time I went home, and this time will be infinitely different to all the previous times I've been home. There will be so many memories to deal with like seeing my dad's clothes, seeing the stuff we bought together, seeing his handwriting on random stuff...stuff I can easily block out when I'm in Glasgow. There will be so many things that I can no longer do with my dad like late Sunday afternoon rides in the car with the top down, trips to Yala and Udawalawe...I don't think I've really thought about that side of it, nor prepared myself for it, so I'm hoping that part won't suck too badly.
So yeah, mixed feelings about getting on a plane on Monday, but overall I think it should be a good break!
